


Cookie Run: The Spice Files

by shrimpfriendly



Category: Cookie Run
Genre: Anarchy, Cultists, Epic Battles, How Do I Tag, Other, Sadness, Wasabi Syrup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:21:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28365348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrimpfriendly/pseuds/shrimpfriendly
Summary: Taking place 5 years after the experiments on Octo Wasabi, Mustard and Wasabi try to live a normal life, or is it normal?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	1. Prologue: a beginning

**Author's Note:**

> JOURNAL LOG OF DR. WASABI PAGE 1
> 
> “I have ultimately decided on what to do with myself! Holy fucking Millennial Tree, I’ve been in a midlife crisis for the past 5 years, who knew life could be so BITTER! To me this seems like I’ll add up to my time around in this world, Mustard got a job and she’s barely home anymore! I need to do something more than life than just experiments and trying to make myself sweet...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> JOURNAL LOG OF DR. WASABI PAGE 1
> 
> “I have ultimately decided on what to do with myself! Holy fucking Millennial Tree, I’ve been in a midlife crisis for the past 5 years, who knew life could be so BITTER! To me this seems like I’ll add up to my time around in this world, Mustard got a job and she’s barely home anymore! I need to do something more than life than just experiments and trying to make myself sweet...”

It’s been 5 years since the experiments of Octo Wasabi...   


** BANG! PTONG! **

A shot of guns from a back alley can be heard from distances, a strange four wheeler drives away from it all. 

“What are we going to do to get away from them?” Yelled a voice with such femininity and a gothic edge, as she ducked into her seat. 

“Hang on!” Another voice said, driving the strange four wheeler. “I got this!” 

A shot of goo flung across the wheeler and into a gang member’s face, it screamed and passed out. The four wheeler sped up. And it drove as fast as it could to a house, which looked like a house, but it was actually a laboratory, the two enter it. 

“Ugh, dammit Mustard!” A voice yelled as its hands were picking up groceries and putting them in the fridge, it was Wasabi. “I forgot to get lettuce.” 

“No worries, Grams.” Mustard said. “Maybe I’ll get it tonight when I go back out for work.” 

Mustard is 19 years old, with slamming breasts and a nice looking skirt with a jacket, she took off her boots and got ready for work. 

“I’m sorry I can’t be here tonight for your experiment, Grandma.” Mustard consulted. “I got to go to work, money’s gotta flow to upgrade the bike somehow.” 

“That’s fine, I guess.” Wasabi said. Mustard heads out the door and drives her motorcycle to work. 

The home area of all needs, Sandy Dunes where they lived, out in the middle of nowhere, it had everything a basic middle of nowhere had, cactus, strange animals, and of course their home. Mustard hit the road for Mint Tea City, to her job, but luckily it wasn’t too far out. It was only just 20 minutes away, they were just there! 

“Cant wait for another exciting day at work.” Mustard sarcastically said to herself. “So many things to do, so many clothes to rearrange. Ugh, and I have to go get lettuce afterwards. Dammit. Nothing for myself.” 

As the night progressed, her job got boring, continuously trying to make it fun, but it wasn’t. It was clothes and merchandise arranging, in a store full of clothes and merchandise. At closing time, she heads home, but something unexpected happened when she got there. 

“Mustard, we’re moving.” Wasabi said to her. 

“Why’s that?” 

“IM GETTING A NEW JOB!” 


	2. Bait

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mustard and Wasabi move to Cream Horn City, but they’re hungry so they go eat some fish and meet someone new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> JOURNAL LOG OF DR. WASABI PAGE 2 
> 
> “I love this new journal! It’s so nice to have this thing around. Anyways Cream Horn City may look nice and all but geez Louise! There are so many football radio stations! They barely play music and when they DO play music, it’s either music praising the Millennial Tree, or that crappy pop! Man, when are we going to go back to the 2000s where there was ROCK EVEYWHERE?! No more of this bullshit I can’t understand!”

After a long excruciating car ride across where they’re gonna go to live, they finally arrived at their destination, Wasabi gets out and begins to stretch. 

“Ahhh... HOME SWEET MONTHLY RENT APARTMENT!” Wasabi yells as she opens the trunk of the storage unit truck and picks up some boxes. They enter their apartment, it was quite small, but not too small, it was an average sized apartment, and it came with a balcony to where you can see the city they now live in, Cream Horn City, it was 6 pm, and they were hungry, Wasabi scurried the internet for food ideas. 

“Everything here is too expensive.” Wasabi complained. “Do you want fish Mustard?” 

“Sure, Grams.” Mustard replied. “I don’t mind some good ol fish, as long as it isn’t poisonous then we’re good.” 

They walked over to the nearest area with fish, they stumble upon a shop? Restaurant? They didn’t care, it was called Salty Fish Shop, they knock on the door and walk in, then a man at the counter with a jacket and no shirt on with a beard looked at the two perplexed women with ease. 

“Welcome to my shop.” The man said. “What are you here for?” 

“I’M HUNGRYYYY” Wasabi yelled, about starved. “Do you have any fish?” 

“I do, I might have to go catch some though, there’s been a drought of fish lately.” The man said. 

“She doesn’t care.” Mustard said. “She’s just hungry, we have never gone fishing.” 

The man got wide eyed, he had the need to show them how to fish, and it was burning in him. 

“Come with me.” He said. “It’s fun, actually. My name is Salt.” 

They enter a dock, Salt eager to put bait on the hook explains how to fish. 

“Okay so, you take this hook, put bait on it, and then you throw the whole thing and try to find a big one.” 

“That sounds fucking complicated.” Mustard complains, “how the hell did you do it?” 

“Years of practice don’t fucking question the arts of fishing.” Salt said. “Now throw the line in and wait.” 

The line gets thrown in, Mustard waits patiently, and quietly, the three of them get quiet, the time passes a few to spare, then the line got tight, they all gasp. 

“Pull it in, I wonder what it is.” Mustard pulling the line in as quickly as possible almost loses it, and then, the thing she caught. 

It jumps out of the water. 

“Holy shit.” Salt exclaims. 

That’s a big ass fish, and it was about to take out the board, Wasabi screams in horror. 

“ITS SO HUGE!” She yells. “Is ANYONE going to kill that... THING?!” 

“I don’t know what the everliving fuck that is, but it’s huge.” Mustard says. “I have an idea, Salt go stab that fish.” 

Salt takes off his coat to reveal his slick still buff abs, damn! For an old cookie he packs a punch. 

“Was that necessary?” Mustard asks. 

“I don’t want my coat getting wet, that’s my best one!” Salt yells. “Anyways, grab the net and hold it over this thing!” 

Mustard grabs the net and throws it over the fish and then 

STAB! 

The thing is dead. Good lord it was huge. 

“That’s... a giant fish.” Mustard examines. 

“This is gonna feed like a whole bunch of people! Wow!” Salt got impressed with her skills, they then removed the skin and had some of it for dinner, Mustard and Salt are friends now. 

“I’m getting a job soon.” Wasabi said at the table with all of them together. “Maybe a science job or something.” 

“Don’t go to the Science of Cookology then.” Salt humbly says. “They’re like... a cult almost, I was almost in it, but I realized the truth and that I don’t need that shit.” 

“Society shouldn’t express itself to cults!” Mustard yelled as her attitude toward society and it obligations to what’s become gets eager, she still had her graffiti paints and spray-paint and if she could, she could ensue madness, but no, this is an area where we have to be civil, or the cops could have you on sight. 

Cream Horn City was no exception to crime, for a long time, there has been cults and drugs galore, hell, they even kill here, and the Science of Cookology is no exception, their building is in this town, along with a base for the Cookie navy as well, and whatever Mustard and Wasabi have in store for this city wasn’t going to be all sweet and sugary, oh yeah, it’s going to get spicy. 


	3. Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wasabi finds a job and realizes things she didn’t have to know.

Wasabi spent days looking for a job that wasn’t infested with the cult Salt was talking about, it was hard, something told her that this city might be pushing an agenda, and then she realized something. 

Back then. 

The terrible truth about Mustard and where she came from. 

Her parents were part of it, that’s why. 

The memory was so distant and then it occurred to her just now that it was it! Then, she stumbled upon a convenient store, it was small, she remembered working in a convenient store before, when she was young. Back when everything was carefree. Back when college was easy. 

She applies for the convenient store job. And gets it, finally, a place with sense. 

“I’ve connected the two dots Mustard.” Wasabi exclaims, laying on the bed. 

“You didn’t connect shit.” Mustard said. “What are you talking about?” 

“I’ve connected them.” Wasabi said again. “This place is full of looney fucks wanting to fuck science in the ass.” 

Mustard confused as hell half got it, what did she mean? Was it society collapsing? Mustard didn’t want to believe her, she was always delusional. But now wasn’t the time. For thus, change was coming, and it wasn’t good. 

A loud noise late at night came from a stadium, a crowd of people cheering and chanting slogans, it felt suspicious, it woke up the two in the middle of the night. 

Confused and in their pajamas, they looked outside to find strange cookies, people chanting things at in a stadium. Could it be the cult Salt was talking about? Nope, doubt it. And then Mustard saw someone. 

Tired. Aching. About to pass out. 

She picked up the someone and took her inside. 

“I hope their okay.” Mustard worryingly said as she closes the apartment door. 

The person she grabbed woke up in Mustard’s bed,the wounds they had on them were bandaged, healing. 

“Wh-who are you?” The person spoke up. 

“Mustard. I don’t know who you are, you looked tired and passed out and you’re pretty bruised. Mustard said brushing off the dirt off of said person. “Nice eye scar by the way. Who are you?” 

“D-Dark Choco...” the person said. “I’ve recently been trying to get over a curse. My head’s a bit fucky but I wont let my bad side get to me...” 

“You can’t move yet.” Mustard said. “You’re still wounded, and I don’t want to bruise anything, it’s best if you lay in bed Dark Choco.” 

“Yes, I will.” Dark choco replied. “I will try to.” 

“Here.” Mustard sets a glass of soda onto the bedside table. “Drink that, I hear it’s good for you. Keep warm, okay?” 

And that’s what Dark Choco did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW BLOG POST FROM MUSTARD!: 
> 
> “I’ve recently encountered someone who has been hurt, they’ve been dealing with a curse recently, their name is Dark Choco, he’s a man with an eye scar, though something tells me... could he have relations to it? Maybe I’m over thinking it. Maybe it’s just something that’s there, maybe he got hurt by someone and got a scar from it.
> 
> Feeling: Curious 🧐”


	4. Fried

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wasabi buys an air fryer, why is this description not surprised.

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” 

Wasabi kicked down the door, Mustard was comforting Dark Choco. 

“Yes, Grams?” 

“G-Grams?” Dark Choco asked. 

“She’s my grandma.” Mustard said. “She’s a pain sometimes.” 

“I BROUGHT HOME A SOUVENIR!!!!” Wasabi said, plopping the box on her bed, it was an air fryer. 

“An... air fryer?” Mustard said, confused. “That’s not a souvenir, that an appliance you buy at a store full of appliances.” 

“Who’s the strange fellow in our home sweet monthly rent apartment, Mustard?” Wasabi asked. 

“Oh this? This is Dark Choco, I found him outside late last night. Outside woke me up and I found him like that.” Mustard replied, holding Dark Choco’s hand. “He had a panic attack this morning while you were out, so I comforted him.” 

“Th-thanks...” Dark Choco complimented. “How are you being so nice to me?” 

“I just am. I bet you needed it.” 

“I never had such a thing before. Ever since the darkness took over...”

Dark Choco was reminiscent, but he couldn’t finish his story due to the thing in the air fryer being done. 

“OH FUCK!” Wasabi yelled. “Air fried chicken is done!” 

Wasabi pulled it out with ease. “Oops! All legs!”

“Hell yeah.” Mustard said. “Yknow Grams, you’re a bit crazy, but you sure as hell pick the best chicken.” 

“Awwww you’re so sweet!!!!!” Wasabi squeaked. “Mr Dark Choco, would you like some?” 

“I guess...” Dark Choco said tiredly. 

They all tried the chicken, holy fuck it was good. 

“MMMMMMNFFF” Mustard moaned in the muffling of munching her chicken. “WHAT THE HELL THIS IS SO GOOD.” 

“OHH YEAH BABY!” Wasabi yelled. “This is the good shit! I love this!” 

Dark Choco tries the chicken again, his frown diminished for a minute. 

“This is... heh. Not bad.” He said. “Probably the best chicken yet.” 

They all feasted on the chicken for the night. Probably a better meal than ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW BLOG POST FROM MUSTARD: 
> 
> “Happy new year everyone. Dark Choco is doing okay, he actually got up and ate something, I’m so glad he’s doing okay. I plan to take him shopping for some cool clothes. And me some new clothes as well. Lol.”


	5. A storm in the midst of a heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year! Wasabi and Mustard and crew engage in a first battle against the cult!  
> Will they live or will they die?

It approached. 

The cult members inside a small hasty stadium were planning a huge attack. And it was inside the mall. 

Salt got the news of the cult trying to attack and headed away from his shop to go find Mustard, after an intense run from the shop to the mall, he finally found Mustard, he cried out her name, worried, Mustard with loads of bags and Dark Choco asks what’s going on. 

“It’s the Cult.” Salt replied. “They’re pushing their agenda and their ‘leader’ is forming genocide against all ‘nonbelievers’ also known as DECENT HUMAN BEINGS WITH A BRAIN.” 

“We gotta go find Grams.” Mustard said, determined to find Wasabi. the Cultists however, saw them. 

“Fuck.” Salt said. “Make a run for it, I have a harpoon. I will stab them with it.” 

“You’re really brave....” Dark Choco complimented. “I used to be very brave and strong-“ 

“Now’s not the time for complicated backstories!” Salt interrupted. “We gotta go find Wasabi!” 

They find Mustard’s motorcycle and drive off, they find a convenient store as well while driving, that’s where Wasabi works now! Salt thought. They enter in the convenient store with the motorcycle, that sounds dangerous but no worries, it’s much cooler in a perspective of reality. 

“Heyy, welcome to the- HOLY SHIT MUSTARD?????” Wasabi yelled out. “Why are you here?” 

“The cult. They’re trying to murder us!” Mustard yelled. “Did you bring your syrup?” 

“Yes actually.” Wasabi said. “I always carry it with me! Lets fight! Rock and Roll!” 

“I have a sword...” Dark Choco said, trying to pull it out. “If we’re going to fight them all off together, we might as well work together to stop them.” 

“us? A team? Nahhhh, I was thinking like a temporary one of project.” Salt piped in. 

“I’ve never really been on a team before.” Mustard eavesdropped. “Lets call ourselves uh....” 

“OOOOH!!! TEAM SUPER SPICY AND SWEXY!” Wasabi yelled. “We have Dark Choco, who’s super I guess, and we have Salt who has no shirt on. Which I think people find that swexy... and then there’s ME AND MUSTARD! we are not sweet cookies! We are spicy! Heheheh!!!!” 

“I mean, it works.” Salt replied. “The reason why I don’t wear one is because I just like don’t like wearing one with a jacket-“ 

The cultists were ganging up on the convenient store, Wasabi screamed. 

“We gotta do something!!!!! Ohhh, I gotta remember what my 4th grade teacher said to me when I was in fourth grade...” 

“Fuck what happened in the past.” Mustard said. “Take what you need and fight for what’s right.” 

The fight began. Several cultists were wiped out, it was over after a long while. 

“Man I’m tired...” 

Mustard passes out, Dark Choco, takes her back to the monthly rent apartment. 

“Mustard...” Dark Choco thought. “She’s done so much good for me, why don’t I help her?” 

“I’m afraid not....” a dark voice called out to him, making him startled. 

“D-Dark Enchantress!” 

“Oh, you haven’t forgotten about me?” Dark Enchantress said with big bruiting eyes. “Why are you helping that little girl? You’re supposed to put the curse on the town so I can have an army of cultists and end the world’s life into Darkness!”

Dark Choco, fell to his knees, being extracted into being more cursed than ever, screaming and crying for help even more now, Salt, who is also trying to take Mustard and Wasabi home notices this too. 

“What the hell... who are you?” 

“Oh! Another cookie?” Dark Enchantress asked. “You must be such a popular person to have such friends! Now Choco... you have 7 days to bring the town and it’s cultists to its knees, with this army I will conquer the world and bring it into darkness!” 

The Dark Enchantress cackled and fled. 

“Don’t worry.” Salt said to Dark Choco. “We won’t let that happen. I must contact an old friend of mine, maybe they can help end the cultists and the Dark Enchantress.” 

“Who are they?” Dark Choco asked.

“Captain Ice.” Salt replied. “They’re the closest thing to more people I know, I would ask another on of mine but, they’re out of town. They have an airplane. But Captain Ice will be out here sometime in a couple of hours. But I suppose you get some rest first.” 

That’s what they all did. Until next morning. 

Meanwhile at the Cookology office, an figure of some sort, Twist Licorice, notices that some of the cultists are dead. 

“Blahsemy.” Twist Licorice said. “Who killed them? Butter Pecan Cookie?” 

“Dare I say their name.” Butter Pecan said. “It was Dr. Wasabi Cookie.” 

“Dr. Wasabi?” Twist Licorice asked. “Are they related to former member, Ketchup Cookie?” 

“Yes sir.” Butter Pecan replied. “Ketchup Cookie is the father of Dr. Wasabi’s granddaughter, Mustard Cookie, meaning Dr. Wasabi Cookie is Ketchup Cookie’s mother. Or a son in law of another cookie that was in this cult.” 

“Interesting.” Twist Licorice said. “Keep them up to date in the halls of our site area, hopefully, this will make our members have a good mindset of who to kill next. How are the other members trying to go clear doing?” 

As they kept talking, an outsider was watching, one with a loaded bazooka of energy drink fluids, they heard every conversation. 

“I gotta find this Wasabi.” The voice said. “Sooner or later they’ll find me out as Energy Drink Cookie.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW BLOG POST FROM MUSTARD?:  
> There is no blog new post from Mustard 🤯


	6. Comrade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another encounter? Well what are the odds! Salt calls for help to a friend, and go to a boardwalk

A ship landed at the docks of Cream Horn City, the plans of Captain Ice to arrive here were clear. The members of the ship came out and along with Captain Ice was a small and shy Peppermint. 

“We’re home.” Captain Ice said. 

“This is home?” Peppermint asked. “It’s nice to call home I guess. It seems nice.” 

“Come, child.” Captain Ice called. “I shall take you to see someone I know.” 

They enter Salt’s shop, and to Salt’s surprise, he was unsurprised. 

“Welcome home.” Salt sighed. “Who’s this child?” 

“I’m Peppermint.” Peppermint spoke shyly. “I love the ocean, and I use this horn to call the whales.” 

“Interesting.” Salt replied. “This is Dark Choco. I know you’re not used to new people, but I’m not cheating on you, we’re divorced anyways.” 

“That’s fine, I still love you, you гребаная сука.” Captain Ice interwinded. 

“I love you so much too, you bitch.” Salt fought back. 

Salt and Captain Ice playfully punched eachother and as they punched they gave eachother a light kiss before Wasabi could open the door and enter. 

Her heart fluttered once she saw Captain Ice, she was everything she wanted from a woman, despite the separation of her husband and death of him, Captain Ice was perfect for her. 

“Grams.. GRAMS!” Mustard yelled, startling Wasabi. “What you got on your mind?” 

“Wha? Oh nothing.” Wasabi said to Mustard. “I may or may not be experiencing any affection during my midlife crisis. HELLO NEW PEOPLE!” 

“You must be Dr. Wasabi.” Captain Ice fumbled. “I’m Captain Ice, commander of the Icepiercer. The small child hiding behind me is Peppermint. It’s okay child, she’s not going to hurt you.” 

“Okay..” Peppermint said, they looked their very best, a very nice outfit for being second in command, a small general hat, with a navy blue cape, and their conch shell, truly they were ready for a set sailing adventure. 

“Nice to meet you all.” Peppermint said again. “It seems nice out, we should go to the beach, or out on the Waffle Cone Docks, I hear the place is a wonderful carnival every night.” 

“I guess we could, but be aware of your surroundings.” Captain Ice said. “I don’t want you to get hurt.” 

“I understand.” Peppermint said. “Mr. Salt, would you like to be with us as we stroll along the Waffle Cone Docks?” 

Salt, unsure looks around with all of his friends. 

“Sure, I guess.” He sighed. “Since I have nothing better to do.” 

Waffle Cone Docks looked beautiful at sunset, carnival games and rides everywhere, it looked like a theme park but near the beach. 

“I just wanted to go fishing.” Salt thought, he then became disgruntled. He didn’t want to be here with his friends and his divorced wife and child. 

“Stop being so grumpy.” Captain Ice said. “If the child is happy, you should be as well. You’re the reason why they’re here in the first place.” 

“That’s HALF the reason.” Salt snapped. “Plus I don’t even remember what else we did.” 

“Wow, you two fight a lot like an old married couple.” Peppermint said, as she threw a ball into the carnival game, reaching a high point and winning a prize. “Why am I not surprised.” Peppermint said, unsurprised, picking out a plush penguin from a high shelf, good lord it was huge! 

“This is mine now.” Peppermint said feeling cozy. “I think I love this.” 

“That’s nice.” Salt said. “Can we go see the others?” 

Over by a giant boom box and speakers was going to be a rap battle. 

“Come and fight me in a rap battle!” A voice called out to Mustard. “Yo! Hey cutie!” 

Mustard got aggravated. “Who’s calling me cute?” 

She turned around, and saw a strange someone with the same boom box and speakers. 

“I’m Polish Mocha Cookie! And you, look hot~” the strange person was into them. 

“What a pervert you are.” Mustard insulted. “Leave me alone and go find someone else to hit up on!” 

“Yeah! Leave my granddaughter alone!” Wasabi shot back, drinking her liquor bottle. “This tastes amazing.” 

And then a horn was heard. 

Oh no. 

The Cult was here. 

“Not again.” Mustard angrily said. “It’s been almost a day why are they doing such a thing?” 

“I JUST WANTED TO GO TO SOMEWHERE FUN!” Wasabi yelled, they were spotted, the cultists went after them, and they ran. 

“HELP US! SOMEONE!” Wasabi yelled as she ran as fast as she could, then a splash in the water from someone with giant tentacles smashed onto the boardwalk, flinging the cultists that spot them into the air and into the ocean, Salt knew who that was and gasped. 

“SQUID INK!!!” He cheerfully yelled, wanting to give his tentacle friend a hug.

Squid Ink appeared out of the water with vigilance, Captain Ice wasn’t too thrilled but Peppermint kind of was. 

“Hello Squid Ink.” Peppermint said. “You’re adorable...” 

Squid Ink blushed and hid behind Salt. 

“Fruit gummy...” Squid Ink was shy and nervous to meet new people. “Looking at me... scary...” 

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Salt said calmly to Squid Ink. “They’re nice, they won’t hurt you. I won’t let them.” He said that while looking at Captain Ice, she simmered down a bit, looking at the child. 

“You haven’t changed one bit!” Salt said looking at Squid Ink. “You’re so cute. I absolutely adore you.” 

The inky creature spun around and saw Wasabi and crew. 

“Ah! What a wonderful thing!” Wasabi said looking at Squid Ink. “You’re a tough little dude aren’t you? Thanks for saving our lives!” 

As she said that, a shuriken made of energy drink fluids hit the side of the dock making it explode, they ran away from the exploded dock, then Mustard got kidnapped by a mysterious figure. 

“Hey! Let go of me! Ugh!” 

Her voice echoed as the mysterious figure escaped. 

“Mustard!” Dark Choco yelled. “Oh no... this is all of my fault.” 

“It’s not your fault.” Wasabi said. “Yknow what? We’ll save her together! Let’s go!” 

But something stopped Dark Choco from going. Shit. 

It was the Dark Enchantress 

Dark Choco grunted from the telepathy the DarkEnchantress was causing. 

“Ghh.. help...” 

“You can’t help her...” Dark Enchantress said. “You have six days to bring the town to its knees. And if you don’t, I will have to make yourself go deeper into my curse-“ 

“OH SHUT IT!” Wasabi yelled. “I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!” 

“ANOTHER ONE?” The Dark Enchantress sneered. “Why must you have so many friends not on our side? What gives?” 

“I just... I JUST WANT TO GET AWAY FROM YOU!” Dark Choco snapped. “You’ve corrupted so many people! You almost KILLED someone! And now you want to mentally drive someone to the ground!” 

“It’s all part of my plan to drive this world into severe darkness!” Dark Enchantress replied. “They honestly deserve it, pitiful cookies! All they do is think of themselves to do good! Little do they know...” 

She faded away. 

Then, Mustard was at the place that she was sent to, kidnapped. 

“Who the hell are you?” 

“No worries.” The figure said. “We’re sorry for kidnapping you, we’re on your side, I’m Aloe Cookie and this is my friend, Energy Drink Cookie.”


	7. Multi Floral

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fuck this is where shit gets sad isnt it

* * *

Mustard was stunned, Aloe? He’s been gone for years, some people thought he went missing, but no, there he was, in Mustard’s presence. 

“I thought you went missing.” Mustard stuttered. “Where have you been?”

“Missing according to the world.” Aloe replied. “But I haven’t been lost, I’ve been here in this city, fighting off this cult for years, but then, Twist Licorice found me out, and I had to hide.” 

“No way.” Mustard said, surprised. “That’s so cool. What about Energy Drink? Who is Twist Licorice?” 

“Twist Licorice?” Energy Drink thought. “Oh they’re evil, they’re the leader of the cult, they’re hunting you and your grandma down because apparently y’all are enemies, speaking of..” 

“There’s someone here to see you.” Aloe said. “They’ve been very excited. I’m very excited too about it actually.” 

Who could it be? Was it Twist Licorice themselves? No.. it was someone else. 

“Hello, Mustard.” They muttered. “I’m your... father, Ketchup Cookie.” 

Mustard was shocked, happy but sad, almost every emotion in the book, all she could do was hug him and sob. 

“You’re back.” Mustard said with tears in her eyes. “I can’t believe it’s you. Why did you leave me with Wasabi?” 

“I had to.” Ketchup replied. “Twist Licorice tore us apart. I had to leave them because of your mother’s health, they threatened to hurt her if I left... leaving you with Wasabi was the only option. They almost got me too, and then Aloe saw me and took me here, we’re actually very good friends. I even met his robots he made.” 

Out of the shadows came Cyborg Cookie, Ion cookie robot, and Cookiedroid, they all finally came to see Mustard. 

“Cookie located, scanning..” Ion did his scan on Mustard, it felt weird but she didn’t mind. 

“Scan complete. Nice outfit.” Ion finished the scan, Mustard’s pants were stylish, and so was her shirt and jacket. 

“Thanks.” Mustard said as she walked over to her dad to give her a hug. 

“Hey uh... dare I say this word, Dad?” Mustard asked. 

“Yes Mustard?” Ketchup said looking at her, that felt strange, she was never used to calling someone her dad, she probably thought her whole life she didn’t have a dad! Mustard, shy to talk to Ketchup, spoke up. 

“Can we... can we buy a soda together?” 

“Sure. It’s been a while since we been out.” Ketchup said. “Years even. I wonder how Mom is doing.” 

“Wait, mom?” 

“I mean, Wasabi.” 

Wait a fucking minute. Mustard thought, Was his mom Wasabi? This felt weird, but nice. 

Meanwhile Wasabi and Dark Choco we’re looking for Mustard. 

“Mustard!!! MUSTARD!!!” Wasabi called for her. “Mustarrrd... where are youuuu??” 

No answer. 

“Mustard IM SORRY!” 

Still no answer. 

“Mustard, I’m really worried now. Where are you?” 

A shadow emerged and prepared for battle, it had green all over them and energy drink fluids. 

“Speak of your name.” Energy Drink said. 

“W-wa-WASABI COOKIE! DR WASABI COOKIE! I have a illegitimate medical degree please spare me please..”

Energy Drink charged up their weapon, they didn’t want to hear about medical degrees, they wanted Wasabi gone. 

“Don’t make me do it!” Wasabi yelled. “This thing is LOADED with syrup of my own! I’ll knock your lights out, bitch!” 

Wasabi fired up her weapon and the two began to fight, there was energy drink fluid and wasabi syrup everywhere. 

“YOU CANT FUCKING STOP ME!” Wasabi screamed, but then she was stopped and so was Energy Drink, and after that... 

They were in a building, a white building. The same building where Energy Drink was gathering information, then a person with a clipboard walked near them. 

“You don’t know who I am... I’m Twist Licorice Cookie.” 

“Let me go you stupid bitch!” Wasabi snarled at Twist Licorice, she wanted to get out of the way she were captured, which was almost like a straight jacket but on a board and duck taped. 

“I’m afraid not...” Twist Licorice said, lifting Wasabi’s head. “You killed half of my cult you whore, you deserve this, we tracked you down, and your son. I’m very dissatisfied and disappointed that your son left my cult, so we hunted them down, we want everyone to be clear in life. Why can’t you let us let your son be clear?” 

“My son?” Wasabi asked, and then remembered. 

Ketchup. 

Poor old Ketchup. 

She held back tears, taking off her goggles to reveal her eyes, they were teal X’s!   
  


“Wasabi.” Energy Drink said. “What’s up with your eyes?” 

“What are you talking about?” Wasabi asked. “They’re always like this... I’ve had em my whole life.” 

And then, the curtain opened in the building room, to reveal a auditorium full of people. 

“Believers...” Twist Licorice said. “We’re finally going to kill these witnesses.” 

The people in the auditorium cheered. 

“Mustard.” Wasabi whispered to herself. “I’m sorry, I’m a horrible grandmother.” 


	8. Baka Mitai

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> LAST CHAPTER BITCHES!!!!!! Then a whole ass hiatus

Dark Choco came back to Salt’s shop after an excruciating long run. 

“Wasabi got taken by the cult!” He yelled. 

Nobody was surprised. 

“The cult?” Captain Ice asked, Salt piped up and explained what the cult was. “They want all of their nonbelievers dead.” 

“I don’t believe in that stuff anyways.” Captain Ice said. “Why would they believe in such things? We got to save Wasabi.” 

“What?” Salt said. “But like, we can’t go in there!” 

“I have a military discount. They’ll let me in.” Captain Ice replied. “They always let people in with military discounts.” 

“She isn’t wrong though.” Peppermint said, rooting for Captain Ice. “They have to do that because it’s the law. And if they don’t...” 

“Then they can get a punch in the neck or arrested!” 

So they head to the building, with Captain Ice’s military discount and disguises and head in. 

“We’re half late.” Salt whispered. “And theres Wasabi!” 

Wasabi got handed a microphone as Twist Licorice was mocking them. 

“So, any last words?” 

Wasabi had to think of what to say, and then she sang instead of said something. 

“Baka mitai Kodomo na no ne...” 

“What the fuck?” Twist Licorice said. “I meant any last words...” 

She kept going.

“Yume wo otte kidzutsuite Uso ga heta na kuse ni waraenai egao wo miseta!” 

“Wait a damn minute...” Energy Drink recognized it. “I know that song! Let me join you!” 

They continued it together until someone recognized it too, it was Captain Ice. 

“I recognize that.” Captain Ice said to herself. “Baka Mitai.” 

So then she snuck up on the auditorium stage and began to sing it with the duo as well. 

“Dame da ne. Dame yo dame na no yo!!!” The three yelled out and sang, and then a band started playing and then Salt, Peppermint, Dark Choco and Squid Ink took off their disguises and joined them, that was the most fun they had the whole time they were in this town. 

“FOOLS!” Twist Licorice said. “You’re friends of them aren’t you?!” 

“I don’t know the one looking all cool.” Salt said. “I bet they’re really nice.” 

“Bitch I’m Energy Drink Cookie.” 

And as she said that, a window broke in the auditorium building, it was Aloe and Mustard and Ketchup and the robots, Wasabi couldn’t believe her eyes. 

“MUSTAAAAAARD!!!!” Wasabi yelled, happy to see her granddaughter again. 

“Grams!” Mustard yelled looking at her 

“Mom!” Ketchup said, happy to see his mom again, they all hugged. 

“I missed you guys so much!” Wasabi said. “YOU ESPECIALLY, KETCHUP!”

“I’m sorry I did.” Ketchup said. “I didn’t know what I was thinking and damaged us, now I forgive myself and everyone for my mistakes, it’s fighting time!” 

Then something stopped them, the Dark Enchantress. 

“YOU AGAIN!” Wasabi yelled. 

“Correct.” Dark Enchantress said. “Dark Choco! You finally arrived at your destination you were TOLD to go to begin with!” 

Twist Licorice saw the Dark Enchantress too. 

“Oh for heaven’s- hey!” Twist Licorice said. “How about we team up? Yknow, convert EVERYONE IN THE WORLD TO COOKOLOGY!” 

“The Darkness will surely consume everyone once we join forces...” Dark Enchantress replied. “But I may have to borrow your body to do it.” 

“Go ahead.” Twist Licorice said. “Do it. BRING THE WORLD TO DARKNESS WITH MY CULT!” 

And then it happened, the clouds in the sky got dark, all the power was knocked out, all there was, red lights and evil magic, an evil figure laughed. 

“LONG LIVE THE COOKOLOGY RELIGION!” It yelled. “FOR WE ARE THE TWIST ENCHANTRESS!” 

Squid Ink formed a bubble around their friends. Protecting them. 

“Don’t want hurt....” Squid Ink said. “Protect you...” 

“We have to do something.” Mustard said. Then the police showed up. 

“FREEZE!” the policemen yelled but however the dark powers hypnotized them and started attacking the bubble. 

Then, Peppermint blew her horn, and blew it twice to summon whales and a legendary ally. 

Sea Fairy Cookie. 

“Peppermint...” Sea Fairy’s voice bellowed. “You have called for me.” 

“The darkness...” Peppermint said. “It’s causing all of this.” 

She blew a few attack but they were not working. 

“I must summon Moonlight, my love.” 

And in came Moonlight like the lightest of nights. Sooner or later, the Fire Spirit came, and then the Wind Archer, and then the Millennial Tree, but nothing could break it, someone came in during this as well. 

“Captain Ice?” 

“Jujube?” 

It was General Jujube and Peach Cookie. 

“DADDY!!!!” Peach yelled. “Why are we here?!?!” 

“I sensed trouble from someone I knew.” Jujube said. “Now be quiet and let’s start a fight!” 

And then, from a distant, Jujube could hear a distant ‘Shine like Me’ 

“HEY BOOMER COOKIE!” someone yelled, they had green hair and low and behold, it was Leek Cookie. 

“Leek Cookie!” Jujube yelled. “Don’t you dare call me that again.” 

“I only called you that because you’re old.” Leek said. 

The fight continued, and somehow, they managed to defeat it. 

“I may have soul...” someone said, blowing apart the beast that was the Twist Enchantress. 

“But I’m no soldier.” 

It was Dark Choco!The evil was defeated! 

“CHOCO!” Mustard yelled, happily. “It’s you!! I’m so happy to see you again!!!!!” The two hugged, and as they were hugging, they stopped because they were blushing. 

“Now we can go back to our normal daily lives! The war is over!” Wasabi yelled. 

As the city was gaining back its normality, Salt however fled to a graveyard. 

Pilot. 

He was gone. 

“I miss you buddy.” Salt said, depressed. “We did the one thing we couldn’t do together. I’m sorry.” 

He held a picture in his wallet of him and Pilot when he was young, those somber memories, back when life wasn’t so hard. 

“If only you came back...” Salt quietly said to himself. “The world wouldn’t have to be so bleak.” 

Then, back at the dock, he went to sleep, but he couldn’t sleep at all, he heard sea shanties, could it be? And then he opened the door. 

Oh lord. 

Not him. 

“Shivers me timbers!” a small man with a mustache yelled. “It be me! Pirate Cookie!” 

“Please go.” Salt said. “I’m trying to sleep.” 

Then he remembered. 

He made a deal. 

And it was all coming back.

_** The end? ** _


End file.
